DRAFTS: x
STARTERS: x
INBOX: x
CURRENTLY ON HIATUS FOR X DAYS.

“..—I’m going to shut up because you’re
an asshole. Not because you told me to.”

“Why would you throw a dildo at a car?
Was there a person attached to said dildo?
Was said person riding the dildo?”

“It’s really hard to take Ariana Grande
seriously when she tries to act sexy
and still looks twelve.”
“What do you think?
Drop the purple and go for white?
I still think I look pretty badass.”

“Lemme tell you a thing – I love Jesus, but I also love to drink… Not a lot, just enough to thin the blood, y'know?”

“Totally overheard someone say Mother Russia could rip off someones dick with her vagina – That doesn’t sound healthy and she should probably see a doctor about that.”

“Do you reckon Kryptonians get like – Super cramps since they have everything else enhanced?”